Archive for July, 2008

8
Jul

The Beginning’s Beginning

   Posted by: Hank    in Three Fellas

The beginning’s beginning is an intricate tale about the last of the three fellas, Hank. Our stalwart companion is an alchemist by trade, specializing in the magical and mystical properties of water cooling and purifying. He comes from a land where the summers are long and the winters are few.

While tinkering in the apothecary trying to create a new tablet that would increase the effectiveness of water purification, Hank accidentally created an extremely potent virility supplement. Being the courageous and confident man that he was, Hank tried the mixture on himself…

As mentioned previously, we find this would-be hero sitting in a tavern with a frozen bag of peas on his man parts. This is because, Hanks lovely lady, having given birth to their third son, due to Hanks experiment gone awry demanded our companion undergo a very danger procedure the andals call a “vasectomy.” For the benefit of our viewing audience, we shall refrain from describing this barbaric, beastly procedure.

Having survived this horrible ordeal, Hank finds himself with much more free time in the after hours and detours, like many a wandering soul, to the local pub to fill the hours of the eve in the company of those looking for answers in the bottom of a mug.

Click Three Fellas Brew – The Story So Far…. for the rest of the posts in the series.

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7
Jul

The beginning of the beginning

   Posted by: Luke    in Three Fellas

As with any great tale worth telling, there is more to the story than initially meets the eye. You see there was another man whose life you might call simple, and yes simple as might be implied. Not to say this man wasn’t an intelligent man, or adventurous, or enthusiastic because he was all these things and more.

His name was Luke and he was from the north country, a rugged land, lacking the most modest of accommodations such as indoor plumbing or running water.  A land that toughens a man and gives him an appreciation of the simple things in life, like sitting in an outhouse, watching the squirrels dance across the tree limbs.

Dave and Luke shared many interests and ideals but sadly they did not realize this as they were from entirely different walks of life. Luke, an old world blacksmith, Dave on the brink of technological success, how they crossed paths is a story of great splendor yet not entirely unbelievable given both of their affections for adventure.

Luke came from a land, a land that was frozen for many moons, where harvests were short and much revered and taverns were few.  Any brew that he  encountered was from one of the local farmers who was blessed by the gods and was given the secrets of creating this sweet nectar of life. However, unlike most youngsters, Luke was not interested in this brew. Sure he may have capped or filled a few bottles, but be assured, he did not have the slightest inclination to drink the brew. He was too involved in beating plow shares in his blacksmith shop or building various contraptions. Living in the city and brewing his own beer was the last thing on his mind…

Click Three Fellas Brew – The Story So Far…. for the rest of the posts in the series.

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6
Jul

The Before the Beginning…

   Posted by: Dave    in Three Fellas

Every great story ever told has a beginning but rarely do you read about before the beginning.  This leaves you wondering, what events transpired that would lead these three fearsome adventurers, nay, heroes to the place and time that is the beginning of our tale….

….. In our story, there is a simple man named Dave and no, he is not simple as might be implied.   Rather he is an enthusiastic, intelligent man, given to introspection, a healthy appreciation of the fairer sex, constantly seeking (mostly halfhearted) ways to improve his status in life. To sum him up in a single sentence would be to say that “He is a man with many great ideas, but lacks the discipline to see them through.”  It was one of these very ideas that caused him to be at the tavern brooding over his beer.

Word had reached Dave and there was to be a tournament, a contest of brews, one in which any man, woman or child could enter and the prize would be a heafty sum of gold.  In addition to the gold, your beer would be featured in the taverns around the world and to the victor, the title of “#1 Longshot Homebrew.”

Upon hearing of this tournament of brews, Dave partnered up with a hulk of a man we’ll call the big red beast.  Together, they pooled their limited resources, travelled to the local alchemy shop, and ordered their beer brewing kit.

Within a fortnight the kit arrived and Dave felt as excited as a child on Christimas morning.  When he shared the news with the beast, the beast had lost interest and moved on to what he considered more interesting endeavours, namely, being a male nurse….

Crestfallen and saddened, Dave put the kit in the closet where it stayed.  He had always planned on brewing the beer, but things always seemed to come up whenever he decided to execute his plans.

After a while, Dave’s beautiful, exotic mistress demanded that he do something about the big box that was taking up space that could otherwise be used to house more important things, like her shoes or handbags.  So, not sure exactly what to do with it, knowing he had to move it, he threw it over his shoulder and trudged down to the local tavern, for a pint to help him figure out what to do…

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5
Jul

The Beginning…

   Posted by: Dave    in Three Fellas

It was a dark and stormy night….  Three lowly adventurers from three different walks of life, found each other in a place where many seek answers to the ruin that is their lives….

These three adventurers were named, Dave, Luke and Hank.  Three men, each with four letter abbreviated first names were destined for greater things.  They, however, had no knowledge of their inner greatness, so absorbed in finding the bottom of their ales…

Hank, with a bottle of light beer in one hand and package of frozen peas resting on his man parts in the other, was stewing over the excess carbonation of the brew he was consuming, never noticed the flaming red hair of Luke, coated from head to toe in soot from the forge, nursing a Mike’s Hard Lemonade in a wine glass.  Luke, so absorbed in thoughts of hot girl and her sister across the street, never notices Dave, leaning back in his chair feet resting on a large package, staring at a Sam Adams, thinking “this can’t be the best the world has to offer…”

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4
Jul

Three Fellas!

   Posted by: Dave    in Three Fellas

Huzzah! First Brew Complete!

Huzzah! First Brew Complete!

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